A couple of years ago, I saw a document film made according to Ferenc Tolvaly’s guidebook. That time, it seemed to be impossible to complete such a long distance by foot. I was just watching, how he walks the miles with a tiny backpack, in ironed trousers. It was no doubt for me, that he completed the jurney, but obviously he was helped by the crew. Then I heard about this pilgrim tour from more and more people, and I started to be interested. The future wife of one of my frieds accomplished this journey before they got married, as she wanted to clarify her priorities before she committed herself to somebody. Then I got to know about an other friend of mine that he’s about to make this journey. So I started to read about it, and it made me more and more excited.
After 2010, a very hard time came into my life. From 2008 on, the difficulties in my work, the continous traveling and the fact that I have to leave my family behind made everything very hard. Unfortunately, this slowly lead to my marriage torn to pieces. My mother’s death in July, then the hope to fix our marriage was not successful, only pain and absence were left behind. I was totally depressed, only the love towards my daughters and father helped me go through these tough months. 
I knew I had to choose, so that I can stand up. I started to look for a new job, starting the changes from here. I beleive God held my hands that time very tight, he guided me with his love. I feel ashamed, that time I did not notice this! Thanks to this, making one of the best decisions in my life, I accepted an offer, which finally lead me to my jounrey today. Many happenings, that seemed to be a difficulty at that point, helped me decide to complete Camino. That time, I did not know how I will do it, but I was hoping! Then all the difficulties followed each other, which might seemed to be a strike. When nothing else comes to your mind bot ’Oh, my God…’ or ’Holy Mary, please help me…’, this is the point when you slowly start to understand and accept, that everything happens for me, and I have to make the best out of it!
I made it! I made important decisions, which I consider as the help of the Holy Spirit. I decided, by the summer of 2013, when my employment contract expires, I do not want to prolong it, but I would like to move home to Hungary. Before, I rarely felt that I could do what I want to. So here is the time, and I will go to El Camino. I will complete the Saint Jacob route with prayful soul. I will go to Santiago de Compostella, which is the third most important pilgrimage after Jerusalem and Rome. Earlier, I had the chance to experience how to offer my pain to Saint Mary for the suffering souls. Now, I will have the chance to offer physical pain as well.
Why?
Many times, we get answers to our questions when we do not expect. On Sunday, after a 14-15 km ’practice’, which was part of a pleasant programme spent with one of my daughters, the priest was preaching to me on the mass!
He started with a story about a rover. The friend of the rover asked him, what is important in hiking, the destination or the journey itself? After a short consideration, the rover’s answer was the destination. Then the friend asked: ok, but what if something unexpected happens? You become sick, your legs hurt, or you just change your mind, and you will not manage to reach your goal? Then the rover answered: I might get sick, my legs may start to hurt, maybe it will take longer than I would like to, but I will reach my goals, because the journey is all about reaching the destination!
Yes, for me the El Camino is the way, which will lead to my goal! I want to arrive to God. And I do know, that during the journey, the currently chaotic thoughts, the past, the whys will become clear.
I would like to complete this journey with a prayful soul. Not only it is the past, that I would like to close down, to find and start to love myself, but learn to lay my life in Lord’s hands, and walk with him throughout my life. So far, sometimes I was very close to this, sometimes very far away. I would like to change this! This might sound a cliche, but I know, I will come back as an other person. It would be so good, if I could be able to say things like Saint Paul did: „I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” (Gal 2, 20). Therefore, using the power of prayer, I would like to join this initiative, and encourage everybody who is reading this, to do so as well.
This site was established by Gábor with his Cursillos friends, because they felt those people, who would like to practice this form of prayer, must be supported. This have some objective conditions as well. Not everybody can afford to go for a leave for 5-6 weeks. There are many of us, whose monthly income covers every neccesary needs, but there is nothing left for any extra. Anybody, who is a breadwinner, is bound to take care of his or her family. Any financial donation throughout my journey will support the furute journey of other applicants. Man shall not live on bread alone. We believe, the ’acting belief’ also means in the letter of Jacob apostle, that we must do something to give others the opportunity to complete this pilgrim trip. Physical wellbeing does not equal feeling good. Anybody who undertakes to walk for hundreds of miles, meditating in themselves, or talking to strangers, it is inevitable to get closer to God. This person will understand the meaning of godly portrait carried by others and themselves. They will find the treasures of their souls. They will realize, what is it, that only they can give to their environment. When learning to decide, what things are important and what are not, we gain free time. Most probably, this is the greatest treasure that people can have nowadays. We beleive that after the pilgrim, this teasure of time will make good for acting love.
My plan
My departure is ont he 17th of September. First, I will head to Lourdes, where, as an accidental coincidence, Gábor also started his way. My plain ticket and accomodation was already booked when we found this out. It might be the reason why you read this right now. Lately, many things helped me to understand, Hungarian language is so wonderful! Just think about Loreto litany, so many wonderful attributives for Saint Mary. Then comes Saint Steve’s offering to the Lady of Hungarians. One of our most beautiful carols is ’Boldogasszony Anyánk!’ /Happy Missus, our Mother!/ I will pray the rosary every day! This I have been doing lately, which helped me a lot. One of my mother’s rosary will accompany me on the way, so this will also help me through physical difficulties. Besides, it will help me get rid of everything I would like to let go.
I will arrive to Saint Jean Pied de Port ont he 19th. On the 20th, I will head to my first day, on the uphill called Napoleon road, meaning 1000 meters of difference in height, 26 kilometers of walking within 7-8 hours.
I don’t want to run. I’m not planning long distances. According to my plans, I will arrive to Santiago de Compostella on the 24th of October, as a worthy celebration of my birthday. Then I will spend a few days in Finistere, then via Barcelona, I will arrive home around 30-31th.
This journey is important to me…
…because I have never pilgrimed before. In highschool, my teacher, ’Klári néni’ (Mam Klári) was trying to organize pilgrim tours for us. I will never forget, she took us for 25-30 kilometers walks, which destination was a pilgrimage, but as a teenager, this was rather fun then a real pilgrim. Still, we admired her. How could she do it in her age, with her body? Now I know, yes, she WAS pilgriming.
I would like my pilgrim to be a form of prayer, which I can offer for myself, for my living and gone beloved ones, relatives, friends. For the ill people, for their recovery, for the disabled children and adults, who I was working with throughout my life, and last but not least for their families, who are many times admirable.
To be able to do this…
… I would like to ask you to help me and this fantastic initiative!
Gábor wrote this in one of his last posts: ’I hope there will be a next pilgrim, who will go and share his thoughts with us on ’veletekvagyok.hu’. He will come back with a prayful soul and will be able to encourage others to get to know and practice this form of prayer.’
I feel honoured to be the next after Gábor, helping this initiative! I have a list, made for myself, stating the names of those, who I will pray for every day.
Please join me in my prayers. If you feel like this community is also important for you, please pray for me, my family, my physical wellbeing and for my peace of mind. If you are able to give financial support on top, you may do this here.
